Two years in equity, diversity and inclusion: what I’ve learned

By Florence Martin

June 9, 2025

Welcome to our new opinion column, in which Florence, URelles’ coordinator, takes a step back from our day-to-day work in the field of diversity, equity and inclusion (DEI) to share her thoughts, personal favorites and observations from the field.

When I started working in Diversity, Equity and Inclusion (EDI), I expected to talk about big concepts, statistics on representation, strategies for diversifying recruitment. And that’s indeed what I do, a good part of the time! But after two years of coaching organizations of all sizes, I realize that some of the toughest obstacles to inclusion are often… frankly unexpected. And sometimes downright human.

Here are three recurring observations that I’d like to share with you.

1. It’s not always a “DEI” problem: it’s often a problem of politeness

We often talk about systemic bias, structural discrimination and policies that need to be reviewed, and that’s necessary. But what we see all too often in the field is a lack of basic civic-mindedness. I’ve lost count of the number of times that, when we survey employees in organizations to understand the issues they face, we hear things that should be basic in the workplace:

Colleagues who don’t respond to greetings.

People who quietly report to management that colleagues haven’t spoken French during their break, without ever having had a direct conversation with these people.

Messages written without hello or thank you, written in capital letters or in red as if we were shouting at each other by e-mail.

These little gestures, or lack of them, create tension, harm the work atmosphere, and make everyone more defensive. Yet these are not issues of equity, diversity and inclusion per se: they’re more a question of communication and basic respect in the workplace, regardless of identity.

2. It’s not just “others” who discriminate

It’s a bit of a harsh observation, but I’ve seen it regularly over the past two years: many people in positions of power in organizations, whether in HR, management or executive positions, make discriminatory gestures, sometimes without even realizing it. This takes many forms:

Small talk“ questions asked to lighten the mood and connect with the interviewee, but which are completely illegal (”Do you have children?“, ”I hear you have an accent. What’s your mother tongue?” );
Promotions based on the manager’s preference rather than on clear criteria;
Disguised dismissals of women on sick leave or returning from maternity leave, especially in traditionally male environments.

When people ask me what I do for a living and I explain that I’m fighting discrimination in Quebec workplaces, I’m often told: “In 2025, there must be a lot less discrimination, harassment and all that. We talk about it so much!”

The truth is, having accompanied over 200 victims of workplace harassment in my previous job and having seen the inner workings of organizations up close in the last two years, my answer is: there are so many more than we think, even today.

And what I notice is that many professionals think that their good intentions protect them from discriminatory behavior. But even if we don’t mean any harm, we can still be part of an unfair practice. And that’s exactly why DEI is important: it helps us put on glasses we never thought we’d have to wear.

3. We’re all pretty much part of diversity in one way or another

Those who resist DEI the most are often people who don’t see their place in it. “It’s not for me,” they say. “I’m a heterosexual white person, DEI initiatives don’t concern me”. But it often only takes one conversation to get the ball rolling.

When we start talking about the challenges faced by caregivers, parents, people living with chronic illnesses, anxiety or mood disorders, or even those whose accent or appearance puts them “on the margins” of the norm, suddenly people understand. They realize that diversity isn’t a closed club reserved for a few categories. Almost all of us are part of it, in one way or another.

And that’s when resistance breaks down. We start talking straight. Working together to find ways of making the working environment more humane, more respectful, more flexible. Not because some URelles consultant said so. Because, all of a sudden, it concerns us personally.

In conclusion

I’ll end these reflections with one thing in mind: DEI isn’t about politics or big, energy-guzzling strategies. It’s often just a series of ordinary choices that we make or avoid making on a daily basis. Choosing to listen before responding. Choosing to question a habit that always disadvantages the same people. Choosing not to hide behind “that’s the way it’s always been”.

So no, it’s not magic, nor is it always rewarding, let alone comfortable. But if you’re in a position of power, that’s exactly why it’s up to you to start.

And it often starts with a simple “Hello” and “Thank you”.